Valentine's Day Book Recommendations | Books To Read on Valentine's Day.
Hey Guys! Happy Valentine's Day in advance! I love you all, you are all my valentine! And so, here is my gift for you!
A gifting guide for your valentine. Even if you don't have a valentine, like me, make sure you gift yourself something and spread self-love!
The so-called love is easy to get along with, it means that love is an instinct, but how to love is an art or even a technology that needs to be learned.
10 Book Recommendations to Read This Valentine's Day
Intimacy involves various fields such as psychology, sociology, and biology, and is closely related to sex, love, marriage, interpersonal communication, and self-cultivation. The study of intimacy has transcended literature and philosophy and has become a specialized science.
Just in time for Valentine's Day, I would like to recommend 10 books to improve intimacy. I hope you can reduce friction, contradiction, and pain in your intimacy, gain warmth, happiness, and joy, and improve intimacy. Collect it now! !!
1. Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe
Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe by Benjamin Alire Sáenz
In the real world of Aristotle, there are two very obvious orientations in his values, which we call Extrinsic Value and Intrinsic Value.
Extrinsic Value is external, generally based on external factors, it represents a relatively broad concept, rather than people's subjective wishes. And Intrinsic Value comes from people's introverted thinking, that is, doing something completely out of their own ideas does not require any return, and can even sacrifice time and other important things in exchange.
At this time, Aristotle stood up and proposed The Ultimate Goal. He believed that everything has an end, and the ultimate goal of people's actions is happiness. Even if they do things they don't want, they are all to make the results more in line with them. subjective will.
But what does this have to do with this book? The protagonist Ari, also known as the first person of the book, has been searching for the purpose of his existence. From the beginning to the end, he has no idea of what he wants and wants. It is not until the end that he knows that it is Dante who makes him really happy, and it is him and Dante.
His love made him angry and made him jealous. Aristotle said that happiness is because that's something that doesn't need any help from others. Because happiness is something that people can do by themselves, and that is basically what everyone is after. Through the support of his parents and Dante's initiative, Ari finally broke through himself and got what he wanted. The author here has a different understanding from Aristotle.
The names of the two people in the book are a joke by the author and a reflection of the two genres. Aristotle represents the easygoing school, which symbolizes reality and integrity, while Dante represents the romantic school, which symbolizes bravery and sensibility. It just corresponds to the character characteristics of their characters, but the funny thing is that in this book, Aristotle likes to write poetry and Dante can draw...
This book is a good book both in-depth and in perspective, a while ago the author said he was working on a sequel to this book, and I'm looking forward to more Ari and Dante stories.
2. The Fault in Our Stars
The Fault in Our Stars by John Green
The story is basically about a 16-year-old girl with lung cancer and a 17-year-old boy with bone cancer amputation who met in a cancer support group, shared the process of life, and fell in love. When I first started, I was attracted by some of the author's witty little humor.
Because such a theme is easy to write as a Korean drama, Korean dramas or tragic love stories are never something I would take the initiative to watch. But the description at the beginning makes me think this book is not what I expected from this kind of story.
Seeing this, I want to say that I have not read many novels about cancer patients or life and death. So I can't comment on whether this book is innovative or not. I haven't read any other books by this author, so I won't be disappointed that this one isn't as good as his previous books. The above two points are basically the main negative comments I have seen on Goodreads, a foreign book review website.
For me, the whole book has a lot of thought-provoking and moving points. And these points do not necessarily love. It is people's thinking about the value of life, life, and love. In addition to the two protagonists, the stories of some supporting characters are also very interesting. The protagonist's story is left to those who are interested in this book to discover for themselves. I'll omit this part of the plot.
For example, a man with eye cancer had to undergo eyeball surgery because he wanted to control his cancer. He was going to become blind, so his girlfriend broke up with him before his surgery. Because there is no way to break up with a blind man, there is no news after the operation.
When he got acquainted with the heroine and talked about it, the heroine expressed different opinions, saying that it is not that nice of you either.. being blind and everything. The boy said it is not my fault. The heroine said I didn't say it is your fault. I am just saying it wasn't nice. [This sentence is just based on impression]
I feel very moved. She feels cancer patients are like a ticking time bomb, when you die, you hurt everyone around you. Can one person blame each other for their selfishness? For a minor, how to deal with a lover who is blind and is likely to die. The same principle can be applied in many ways.
A person who is suddenly seriously ill, suddenly bankrupt, and suddenly becomes abnormal because of some changes, maybe it is not your fault that these things happened, but because of this, people around you suffer with you, "it wasn't nice".
Some people can't be hurt by these things, like parents, like those who can't leave you. And for those who have a way to leave you, should one accept without complaining, because it also makes sense if one can control the scope of harm in one thing.
3. Five feet apart
Five Feet Apart by Rachael Lippincott
When I first read this book, it was not difficult to understand because I read the introduction, and I wanted to read the English original. When I saw the comments, some people said that this book is too affectionate and young.
Maybe I personally think that the protagonists of this book are two teenagers, always with an idealistic color, and have the courage to do nothing. My tears were not high, and I was really moved to cry when I saw the back, maybe it was a yearning for a beautiful thing.
I originally thought it was a bit inexplicable that the two of them knew each other and liked each other, but a lot of times, the mutual admiration between two people was an inexplicable beginning. This slightly closed space of the hospital is home to all kinds of patients, and their disease prevents them from getting close to each other, and the existence of each other may even pose a threat to their lives.
The article is explained from a double perspective, allowing readers to better understand what happened, and what they are thinking, and the context is clear. In the beginning, the heroine, who looked tough and confident, opened her own channel and shared her story. In the beginning, the male protagonist was rebellious, adventurous, and lived in the present without caring about the future.
Two completely opposite people, from disliking each other to sympathizing with each other, actually don't seem to be so bloody. The heroine's vulnerable side is slowly excavated in the middle of the story. Her fear, lack of confidence in the scars on her body, and her desire to give up a precious opportunity in the end all let us see a more complete side of this character.
The male protagonist no longer resists treatment because of the appearance of the female protagonist and begins to cherish life, or more precisely, the time he spends with the female protagonist.
As living people, as I read, they seem to move in front of my eyes, creating scenes in the story. Every collapse, every joy, and every tangle of theirs affects my mind. So by the end, the emotions follow. I don't think this is an overly sensational book with no connotation. Maybe because I'm about the same age as the hero and heroine, I read their stories as if they were my friends, and I watched it all from the sidelines.
The last, the last, is an open ending. There is no great joy or great sadness, the author finally said, hoping that more people will pay attention to this disease, and new treatments can be developed to help them; I also hope.
4. Pride and Prejudice
Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen
There are several books on my pillow all year round, one of which is Pride and Prejudice. It has been with me for almost ten years. Many nights I can't sleep, and I will casually open it to read a passage, whether it is Darcy or Elizabeth at the ball The spark-splashing confrontation was still Mrs. Bennett's neurotic nagging. Jane Austen's wit always captivated me, and I smiled knowingly and then reminisced about a familiar plot.
She has never left the country town where she lives, so her books have never had any historical plots, indignant accusations, and revelations of the dark world. The ability to write over and over again the ordinary characters in her life, their little happiness, their little troubles, their little calculations, and their little scheming.
Although those stories all happened in the English countryside of the 19th century, they are still lively and vivid today. Not a great writer, but she is definitely the smartest writer in my heart, the most lovely woman Jane Austen wrote of those women who still live in our world today, a little like Charlotte, cool. Sober, grasp the opportunity decisively, and choose a marriage that does not require love.
Some are like Lydia, rash and naive, thinking that they are brave for love, but they are actually just bargaining chips for worldly interests.
Some are like Mei. They do vulgar things, but their hearts are very eager for their love.
Some are like Jane, weak and kind, passive and reserved, watching love disappear without the courage to keep it, and the vain sister Bingley, the innocent Miss Darcy, of course, there are women like Elizabeth.
Gentle and firm, intelligent and open-minded, she has never compromised even at the cost of lifelong loneliness. She thoroughly understands all disappointments and flaws but understands them with tolerance. She is such a good girl to be cherished, just like Jane Austen and the reality is always It's impossible for such happiness to appear.
Jane Austen has never been married. Her only good friend is her sister Cassandra. Her wit and naughtyness, her stubbornness and tenderness finally did not wait for someone as worthy as Darcy to appreciate her. There are many friends around and there are women like Jane Austen.
They are talented and have the courage to face life seriously. They are also working hard to enrich their hearts and feel the beauty of the world with their hearts. They also know how to properly take care of themselves. The fire loved others, but now they are all alone. They are like pink and white peaches and plums blooming in the valley. Even if no one appreciates them, they must live richly. They understand life. They should live for themselves.
The story always feels a kind of inexplicable whitewashing of peace, but arrogance and prejudice have never felt this way. All women got their best ending. She gave them happiness, that is, her own happiness. She taught us like this, Don't despair of the world because of a little loneliness, so this ending doesn't make people feel a little blunt.
It's all within reach of happiness and warmth. Continue to hold good hope, not because of naivety, but because we believe in ourselves and have the ability to make ourselves happy no matter what Whether that person will come or not, in the end, we are all the most beautiful and unique women.
5. The Perks of Being a Wallflower
The Perks of Being a Wallflower by Stephen Chbosky
It finally snowed in Chicago this afternoon, and I sat by the window reading the novel "The Perks of Being a Wallflower" that I had been reading for the past few months. I was in tears twice reading this book. This is a beautifully written novel, the text is very simple but reveals a rare innocence.
This is an epistolary novel. The story takes place in the early 1990s and describes the life of the protagonist Charlie's first year of high school through a dozen letters. Charlie has a brother who is very good at sports and a sister who is very good at grades. He is a sensitive and delicate little brother at home. In the face of strong brothers and sisters, he always seems reticent and gets much less attention from his elders.
At school, he was the gregarious wallflower boy, never in a relationship and with few friends. He is immersed in his own world. He likes bands like The Smiths, Pink Floyd, and Nirvana. He likes to make mixed tapes of his favorite songs and give them as gifts to others.
Like every high school work, there are prom, graduation, and after-party in it, but this book is not just about growing up and how to face life positively, because the tone of the whole book is very gloomy, You can tell by the psychedelic garage rock songs Charlie listens to, and there are several marijuana-smoking scenes in the book.
This book not only writes pure love about first love, first date, and first kiss, but also involves the dark side of drugs, alcohol, gay, abortion, suicide, molestation, and so on. Charlie's world is complicated, because when he was young he had to deal with so many things that were heavy in the adult world, and Charlie's world was very simple, he was so simple, all he needed was friends and The warmth of the family.
Charlie is always between two extremes. The psychological shadow and inferiority of his childhood made him a little autistic. Although his feelings about the world are so rich and interesting, he can't integrate into the real world, and he has no idea about his talent. I don't know. Until he met two of his favorite people in the world - his best friends Patrick and Sam...
I want to use words like bohemian and rebellious charm to describe Patrick and Sam respectively, but I feel that this is not enough to express their special charm. It is better to quote the original words from the two paragraphs of the book. When Charlie was hospitalized, Patrick came to visit him, "The best thing about Patrick is that even when you're in a hospital, he doesn't change.
He just cracks jokes to make you feel better instead of asking you questions about feeling worse." He's such a cool guy and kind and caring to his friends. Charlie was very fond of Sam the first time she met her.
Sam treated him tenderly like a big sister and taught him a lot. He gradually fell in love with Sam, and Sam already had a boyfriend, she clearly refused I met him, but I'm still very good with Charlie, and it's not the kind of ambiguity, but like before, it has the tacit understanding of good friends and the warmth of sister and brother.
On Christmas day when they exchange gifts, Sam tells Charlie that her first kiss was a shadow of childhood, and she kisses Charlie and says "I want to make sure that the first person you kiss loves you, okay?".
This is a book about the friendships that grew up in alcohol, marijuana, and rock and roll. It is also a book written in such famous books as "The Catcher in the Rye", "The Great Gatsby", "To Kill a Mockingbird", "The Fountainhead" and so on. Find yourself in the book.
I especially like that the author uses very simple sentences to accurately convey some subtle feelings, and the songs mentioned in the book provide readers with a channel to experience the book from an auditory point of view, and the selected songs are really suitable for the book. situation.
The most memorable sentence is that Charlie, Patrick, and Sam were in the car together, their favorite song called "Landslide" was playing loudly in the car, and they drove the car faster when passing through the tunnel, feeling the tunnel The wind was howling, they screamed happily, and Charlie said, "I feel infinite".
6. Seriously, I'm kidding
Seriously...I'm Kidding by Ellen DeGeneres
Ellen is the most handsome woman I've ever seen; she's wearing canvas shoes, skinny jeans, a plaid shirt, and a fitted suit, her eyebrows are raised, and her pale blue pupils are like holes. Admittedly, it's the first time I've seen her. I fell in love with her when she was there;
no matter whether men or women saw her, they would fall in love with her;
not to mention that her thin lips kept saying interesting things, and the temperament exuded from her body made me want to become her immediately;
Seriously… I'm kidding;
reading Ellen's monologue can be like reading a novel, watching three months of shows in one afternoon; this book is a wise little woman, at the time of afternoon tea, the words spoken with a smile; relaxed Funny; I don't like to read too much and think too much, and if you'd like to tell me a joke, I'd be happy to hear what you have to say; actually I didn't figure out what's funny about it, or even heard what you said; because when I look at you talking, the lips have already made me intoxicated;
7. Norwegian wood
Norwegian Wood by Haruki Murakami
It seems that too many people started contacting Murakami because of "Norwegian Wood". However, "No" is just an anomaly in Murakami's works, it is an exploration of the realistic style of Murakami. After this exploration, he never tried a similar way of writing again. From this, it can be roughly guessed that for him personally, <No> was somewhat wrong.
However, as the most special, approachable, and popular among Murakami's works, "Noh" is easier to accept in a wider range than other works. Sometimes when it comes to Haruki Murakami, it must be "Norway".
"No" is indeed very good, and Murakami has gained more recognition through this work. If it wasn't for "No" paving the way ahead, he probably wouldn't have reached the point where he is almost a household name today. Because after all, the audience of his mainstream works is actually not that many.
If you come into contact with Murakami's other works because you like "Noh", especially because you are lingering on those pure and beautiful loves and want to see more similar things, then it is a pity, and most likely you will be disappointed.
Indeed, there are many voices of disappointment that begin with "No" and linger next to works that should have received higher ratings. Do you feel that "Wuwuwu" doesn't know what it says, "The Shape of a Strange Bird" is bizarre, and does Murakami change his tenderness and deal with some absurd fates that he doesn't know so-called all day long?
Are you reading, often confused and anxious because you don’t know where the plot will take you; and after watching the whole work, you haven’t gained more than some fantastic experience and interesting wording and sentence making?
It's not the problem of the work, but the introduction is wrong. Murakami is not your cup of tea.
Why can't I destroy the acquired heart, read it in sequence quietly and casually, and then read it in depth again and again, until the hidden tentacles in the book finally reach the depths of the heart slowly and clearly?
However, if what you like is the clean and alienated language, the tireless details, the desolation that permeates life, the confusion that seeks but ultimately finds nothing, and the overwhelming unspeakable loneliness, maybe you should try it Take a look, it may be an unexpected surprise.
Not to mention the additional hallucinations, such as the various life experiences that can be regarded as a silent wind like the passage of time, or a heavy, surly and incomplete life to explore and think about.
From a certain point of view, it is precisely this "Norwegian Forest" that has become a small barrier for most of Murakami's novels and is slightly misleading to the well-known Murakami.
8. Our Souls at Night
Kindle recommends reading for an hour and a half, which should be a relatively easy-to-understand novel. So much fast reading every day that I almost want to give up on the slow pace at the beginning of the novel. After Jamie came, it might feel like a beautiful sunset story, but instead, there was some hope in my heart.
In our current life, there are so many rules and regulations, so many secular visions that we care about, and so many responsibilities and obligations that need to be undertaken. Maybe one day when I reach 70 years old, when I get old, when I no longer have the ability to contribute the so-called value to this society, maybe I can really start to enjoy life and enjoy the intimacy between people who are not afraid of the world.
It's like putting down all the masks in the middle of the night, lying relaxed in bed, and chatting with you about the past and present. It would be nice if the novel ended here. But perhaps the author still found out in the last moments of his life that there is no real freedom in life. "Darling, are you cold tonight?" This is the chance for respite that we find within the framework. People are desperate and seem to be full of strength.
Do you think you have the right to decide your own choices when your life is too late? Actually not, from the time you came to this world to the time you left, you were always struggling with other people's choices and your own choices, and in most cases, you lost. It's as if you came into the world without a choice, and it's as if Eddie chose not to be separated from Louie.
But don't despair, even so, there may be someone who will hold your hand gently at night, tell your ordinary and ordinary life, smell the air with you when it rains, and listen to the rain sound. Even with so many limitations, your souls can comfort each other "at night".
And anyway, life has always been like this, so how can it be bad now? Anyway, until old age is constantly fighting and compromising, so now these denials, pressures, and doubts seem so normal. Because so-called bad is just the norm, and happiness is accidental.
In the face of the various levels set by this world, the mutual embarrassment between family members is the most suck. They were supposed to protect each other from the outside world or to support each other in difficult situations, but sometimes they do it all in the name of love.
I really hope that I will not superimpose these sufferings on my children in the future, and I hope that they will spend their energy fighting against the world instead of breaking this cycle with me.
9. Lady with the Little Dog and Other Stories
Lady with the Little Dog and Other Stories by Anton Chekhov
Love is but one's fantasy, one's self-indulgence, one's resort.
We indulge ourselves in love in order to be detached from reality, to escape from reality. Every time reality crushes our faith we would resort to love, solacing ourselves with the fancy that we are engaged in something higher than real life.
Everything, in reality, can become trivial and indifferent only when we cling to something higher and unattainable. Sometimes, what we love is the self-image reflected, or we imagined to be reflected, in our lover's eyes.
There is a beautiful description of their love near the end of the story: “It seemed to them that fate had intended them for one another, and they could not understand why she should have a husband, and he a wife.”
Nonetheless, they must know that their affair can never be converted into a husband-and-wife relationship, because marriage is part of reality, and that means all the fantasy of their affair will be disillusioned at once.
Consequently, although it seems they are so near to reaching a decision for their future, to starting "a new beautiful life", they would never do. Love is fantasy, therefore it has something more genuine than reality.
10. Essays In Love
Essays In Love by Alain De Botton
If you are sentimental, proud in your heart, elegant in manners, you have suffered from love anxiety, you are currently in a state of a broken love, or you don't know what your other half is thinking.
If you feel that it is difficult for anyone to understand you, the comfort of your friends is useless, you have been autistic or abstinent for a time, you have thought about seeking psychotherapy or religious support, or even have thoughts of suicide, then you should need an experience similar to you,
but not So cynical or even empathetic and thoughtful people to communicate their thoughts, then you can choose to read "Essays In Love", you will find that Alan is simply your soul confidant, and you will feel more comfortable after reading it.
People who are conquered by love and tortured by love in this world have the same psychological feelings, whether they are yellow-skinned or white-skinned, whether they are great writers or no-ones, whether they are famous nobles or ordinary white-collar workers.
The ending is kind and gives hope. When Cupid shoots an arrow of love at a person again, that person will still feel that the former despair turned out to be just a deep disappointment.
Students who hope to learn some love methodology don't need to read this book. Although Alan has made notes for love, he knows that notes and high scores are not necessarily related. Seeing through love and winning love are two different things.
I don't know why he wrote this book. He was born into a wealthy family. He should not be using his talents to earn royalties. Maybe he was just doing nothing to commemorate some of his immature thoughts and behaviors in the past.
Why should I watch it? I'm just interested in the love thinking of a person who has dabbled extensively in religion, psychology, philosophy, ethics, art, architecture, and literature.
After reading this book, I also entered several other major works, such as "Consolation of Philosophy", "Anxiety of Identity", and "The Art of Travel". I must say, this book also has something that impressed me, but it is very interesting. It happened not to be written by him, but the quote of Elias quoted: "It is not difficult to see through the world, but it is of no use to oneself."
There is a passage in the book, that discusses "mature love" and "immature love":
Mature love is commendable in almost every way, and it works by being acutely aware of each person's strengths and weaknesses. Mature love is full of self-control, does not idealize things, and is free from envy, masochism, or obsession. Mature love is a sexual friendship that is harmonious, pleasing, and responsive (perhaps this explains why many people who understand desire do not call this painless emotion love).
Immature love (though not so much related to age) is a story that oscillates between idealization and disappointment, a precarious state of ecstasy, bliss and drowning feeling, and overwhelming abhorrence, in which, the feeling of finally finding a sweetheart is accompanied by a feeling of loss that has never been experienced before. The logical end of immature (because of absolute) love is death, either symbolically or in the true sense of the word.
The climax of mature love is building love together and trying to avoid the daily feuds (Sunday newspapers, forcing each other to change their pants, remote control) that lead to the breakdown of love. Immature love does not accept compromise, and once we refuse to compromise, we embark on a road of no return to the end.
For someone who has already experienced the pinnacle of immature passion, the decision to marry is an unbearable price - it would be better to drive off a cliff and end it all.